It can't go without saying that I'm truly terrible at maintaining a blog..
Anyways.
I'm writing this blog post while sitting on my balcony, back in peaceful North Carolina. NYC round 1= conquered.
I'm so head over heels in love with this city. Some thoughts on New York part one...
(Pictures included!! The pictures are just a few of the places that were part of everyday life in the city for me. Courtesy of the awesome Michelle You!)
(BK til I die, y'all)
Looking back now...wow. I remember around this time 6 months ago, I was trying to mentally prepare myself to take on this big city. I remember how nervous/scared I was...but I also remember that for whatever reason God placed it on my heart to pack my bags and move out of the comfort zone and to Brooklyn, and that I was ready to see His hand move in my life. And to learn to trust Him, to change my perspectives, and to teach me to see people as He does. Really thankful now that I trusted Him and not my wallet, or fears.
Oh what it is to be young and in New York City. I still remember how the first week for me was an absolute disaster- crying literally every time my parents called, being super homesick, trying to get used to the pace and to this drastically different environment...getting lost in Harlem at 11 pm my first night in the city...oh boy. It's super cliche, but I moved here nineteen years young and wide eyed. I don't think that even I realized what I was getting my self into, or even worse, how young I was. Apparently in NYC, being nineteen is equivalent to being an infant. But *humblebrag* I think I fared pretty well. I have God to thank for that. If it had not been for His hand taking care and watching over my every move...wow. His strength alone. Love you Jesus.
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| (My doorway) |
Clearly, one of the biggest differences between life in le country and life in NYC is the different kinds of living spaces. When I first moved in to my apartment in Park Slope, Brooklyn (aka an awesomeee neighborhood), I was like oh, this is so small. What will I ever do. But again, once I got used to it...it was actually the perfect amount of space. Do we even need that much space anyways? Also, a more concise living space keeps you from buying too much unnecessary stuff. My roommates are awesome...so thankful for them! Miss them. And again...favor of the Lord...I really lucked out on this apartment. The rent was doable, I lived 4 blocks from 9 different trains so commuting wasn't bad at all, and I had everything I needed on my block- laundromat, organic food 24-hour store, bagel shop, thrift store, movie rental place, a pub, etc. Within my SAME block. So blessed. Oh, and I could see the Manhattan skyline from my roof. What what. Pretty awesome man...
(the view from my roof. well, one angle at least)
(waiting for le train, N train here) (5th Ave, Brooklyn. Home.)
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| (Gorilla Coffee! Best coffee in Brooklyn, hands down.) |
All the culture, and food, and abundance of things to go...another reason why I love this place so much. The comic book stores here...oh my goodness I was in NERD HEAVEN. Forbidden Planet on 13th, and Bergen Street Comics (right around the corner from my apartment too) we're probably my favorites. The selection is A+...if I had only had a little extra cash. I was always broke, however, because New York has THE best food in the world and you can't tell me otherwise. All my money literally went to rent, bills....and food. It's funny how the city changes your palate. Now I crave things like hummus and pita, or Thai food, or Indian...and God forbid I eat at a chain restaurant in the city! (I mean, honestly, why would you.) Some of my favorites were Bite, Mamoun's, The Vagabond Cafe, Bare Burger, Baluchi's, The Black Sheep Pub, the list goes on. Check them out, dine there, and be changed. But yeah. There's always tons to do, lots to see, tons to learn, etc. Did I mention the free entertainment on the subways all the time? So many actually good performers on the train platforms! The violinist who's at the N/Q/R at 59th, the quartet I heard once on the A/C/E at 42nd, the band with the guys in the pink gorilla suit at 34th, etc. Love it. I have story after story about awesome nights out in the city, coming home late on the trains (hilarious stories there), doing some not so wise things, good talks with awesome people, etc. But I will spare you.
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| (The Vagabond! Best cafe in the West Village..or all of NYC) |
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| (Bergen Street Comics!) |
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| (Black Sheep Pub- best $5 dinners, and good chats. Park Slope, ftw) |
I love all things different, odd, and against the status quo. These are the kind of people I met/saw in New York. The abundance of diversity here is truly astonishing- NYC is kind of like, the whole world crammed into this tiny space stacked on top of each other like sardines and its beautiful. I loved that I could get on the train and hear all kinds of languages being spoken, all kinds of people from all walks of life sharing the same train car. No one in New York looks alike and that's so beautiful. People here are all so driven and willing to learn and tolerant of others. I love that people here enjoy intelligent conversation and a good cup of coffee. Anyways. I love the energy of the city- this city seriously never sleeps. Now that I'm back I miss the loudness and the honking and the neighbors partying on the roof at 3 am, etc. The atmosphere in NYC is unmatched. This energy and atmosphere did wonders for my creative juices too.However, you see really weird things here too. Anyways.
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| (Joy Burger Bar, aka, work) |
Sure, New York is fun. But living here is no joke man...the saying "if you can make it here, you can make it anywhere"- it's true y'all. This place can be stressful, and it's not for everyone. On top of being super expensive, there are just days where you wonder why you do this to yourself. I mean, nothing like armpit in your face on an ultra packed 5 train during rush hour after a stressful shift at work. I worked at 4 different places within a span of 5 months, and that was stressful I suppose. Also, the fact that I worked full time and went to school sometimes would get to me. A good lesson in time management though. I remember my first public cry in New York- I sat down on a bench on 59th street and I just cried. Didn't care what anyone thought. Am I a real New Yorker now? But I really can't complain. This city is so worth it.
And then there's my other home here- Hillsong. This church was home for me. I cannot even begin to tell you how much this church and it's people have blessed my life. And how privileged I am to be a part of what God is doing in this city. Like where do I start?? I mean, first of all, where else do you see people waiting in line outside, for an hour regardless of the weather, to go to church? I loved when other people would walk by and they'd ask me what the line was for, and the puzzled look I'd get when I said church. But God is moving big time here. And the people that I met here are amazing. My connections team- you guys are all truly legends. Miss you guys already! I love how passionate everyone here is about building God's house and making people feel at home. People here are truly passionate to serve- I learned so much from them. It's good to be back in NC this summer cause there's so much I want to pour back out to my congregation here. But I truly have no words to express how thankful I am for the people I was able to work with here- they became family to me. One of my biggest fears about moving was the fact that I'd have to leave my family in NC, and they are awesome. But God gave me a family at Hillsong, and they made life there incredible. So so thankful. You guys don't even know the impact each and everyone of you had on me. I'm dead serious. Thank you for your friendships, your wisdom, and the life you breathed into mine. Thanks forreal.
In the end...I am just really thankful. It really goes to show that when you throw caution to the wind, and are willing to let go of security to walk in His will, you will get so much more than you bargained for...more than you dreamed of. New York has not been easy, but it has been so worth it. I grew as a person, learned to be responsible etc, but more than anything, I love how I saw God move in my life. I learned to trust him FULLY- to walk with him at all times, to rest in the fact that He is God and ever so sovereign, and that he knows my needs, and that if he called me somewhere, He was gonna supply it all and he has. Exceedingly and abundantly. I was able to see the literally supernatural provision of God in my life...like wow. I am so humbled.
I'm not really good with words, and I honestly don't know how to explain it, but I came out of this a much stronger person in faith. I'm not sure how, but he used this change of location to work on some the kinks in my soul...little by little he is changing every part of me. New York taught me to be more compassionate- there is so much need! and it dwells next to extravagant wealth. All the homeless people that I encountered taught me so much- that everyone has a story, that these people still have dreams and expectations, that I was filthy blessed and it stirred in me the notion that I had no option but to give it all away. New York taught me that nothing else matters, but give me Jesus. Crazy how living in a place that offers you everything you could ever want for the price of some cash teaches you how meaningless it all is. Nothing else matters. The fact that I don't own anything really- I mean, I rent my apartment, and have no car- is so freeing. Nothing to lose, everything to gain. New York taught me that I cannot settle for a complacent life- you get one shot at this life, go hard or go home. And this city...well, you literally have to work hard or else you will not make it, and I needed to learn to push myself. I learned that I am more capable than what I thought I was capable of. And there's so much to learn still! New York taught me to be ready for anything....this place is so spontaneous. I could go on forever about the things this city taught me.
I am just so thankful. If it had not been for God...I don't think I would've made it. Honestly. All glory to Him alone....
New York City, thank you for everything. You are so beautiful. I miss you, I miss your energy, your people, your food, your culture, your pace, your atmosphere...but I need to take a breather. See you in eight weeks- already can't wait for round two.
Love always.
